Keitaro May Cry
by Lord of Hina
Summary: A run in with an unnatural evil during the meeting with his promise girl changes Keitaro's life forever. After years of working under the Son of Sparda, Keitaro ends up at the Hinata Sou, but with a much different mindset than before. Something evil may lurk within the walls of the dorm, or even worse, within its occupants. KeiHarem
**Yeah, so I had this typed up far longer than Afterglow and had planned on this being a much longer chapter than what it is. However, I've had a really bad time with writing this year so far and I don't know when I'll be back in top shape. Either way, I'm only posting this as a small apology for the wait...and unfortunately, you'll probably be waiting on this story too…**

 **Well, here's a Devil May Cry crossover. Only because why not?**

* * *

 **Mission 1: A Crazy Party**

The brisk wind would have sent a chill down anyone else's spine, but he had felt colder. It wasn't even winter yet anyway, and complaining about a little chill was a sure way to have them on his case.

Them, being his sensei that he hadn't seen in quite some time. Three or four years to be precise.

Either way, standing at the foot of the Hinata Inn for the first time in also oh so many years, the young man found himself sighing several times, simply looking up the steps. He placed his hands on his hips, shaking his head. His rimless glasses gave no glare as he looked back up. Tightening the fingerless leather gloves on his hands, he wondered if everything would go as smoothly as he hoped.

The young man pat his sides, feeling the two metallic objects on his waist, concealed beneath a forest green trench coat with the front open, revealing his chest and modestly sculpted abdomen. Wearing black skinny jeans as well, the person already looked out of place. (Dante's outfit from DMC 3, but green.) But standing in front of what appeared to be a shrine entrance and staring blankly at it for several minutes would probably be why people would call him crazy.

"Well...I'm here. But now what?" He wondered to himself. He couldn't just go up and tell his grandmother the full truth about why he was there. The senile old woman would probably have a fit. On the other hand, the second reason he was there would most likely appeal to the old bats softer side. With a shrug, and hoping that concealing the full truth would make his job just a bit easier, the young man began to walk up the steps slowly, a small 'clinking' noise being heard with each step.

'I'll visit Haruka after I talk to granny.' He thought as he gazed at the tea shop with a wry smile. He was sure the not so old woman would be happy to see him just as he would be genuinely happy to see her. Plus, he was sure...at least, he wanted to be sure, that she wasn't one of... _them_. She knew about the real him, but they had lost contact a year ago.

Finally reaching the top of the steps and without even stopping to take in the sight of the building before him, the lone man walked right up to the front door and pushed it open. 'That's odd...where is everyone? I can't really sense anyone here either...'

Knowing his sensing abilities were off anyway, something he needed to train in more, the young man called out when he entered. "Hello? Granny Hina, you here? It's me, Keitaro! Haruka?"

 _Anybody..._ he thought with a rising sense of dread. It was far too quiet within the building, but once again, he couldn't sense any dark energies about just yet. If some demon had come and taken over the Inn, their presence would have been felt outside of the property, even with the young man's terrible sensing ability.

Keitaro sighed, knowing that he was jumping the gun, just like always. He was over thinking his situation. Maybe it was just an off season or something.

"Ah, whatever! I'm here, I'm tired, and I want to take a soak!" The bespectacled teen announced while stretching his arms over his head. "Now where were the hot springs?"

Within only a few more minutes, the teen had found what he was looking for. Taking off his green trench coat and hanging it on a rack in the prep area, Keitaro undressed and unceremoniously tossed his clothes about. However, he took the two metallic objects from his waist, which happened to be 1 silver and 1 black pistol, and carried them with him to the hot springs. With no hesitation, he jumped right in, holding the guns in each hand. With a sigh, he leaned back and began to relax.

"Man I forgot how relaxing this place was...and good thing these are waterproof..." He said as an after thought since he had unconsciously brought the weapons into the springs with him. Shrugging once more, he simply relaxed even more, plunging the firearms back underwater as he closed his eyes and began to daydream.

'...The promise girl...' He thought with a bitter smile. 'I missed two years already, she could have already entered into Todai and even found someone else. Nothing is set in stone...how do I even know if she's alive or not...'

The thought of death made Keitaro frown. It was something he had dealt with on a constant basis in his line of...profession. With a deep sigh, Keitaro tried to think of something else, keeping his eyes shut and his body relaxed. It was almost like an instant meditation.

'So what of the problem here...I can't sense a thing, and granny isn't here. I wonder...if she...'

Once again, his mind was wandering in directions he would rather not have them go. While he once again tried to get his thoughts together, he failed to hear or even sense the approaching person. He only looked up once a 'splash' was heard. Quickly pointing both guns in the direction of the person, Keitaro's eyes widened and a blush encompassed his body at what he saw.

A younger girl, probably around 17 or 18, was in the bath with him. Her long light auburn hair looked luscious and pooled around her naked body slightly...NAKED BODY!

Keitaro quickly hid the guns under water and watched the girl wearily. 'What the hell? Is that sensei in a disguise? Or is this girl really about to bathe with me...and why didn't I sense her come in?'

His thoughts ran a mile a minute, but none of it mattered once the girl actually spoke.

"Bathing at noon is the best! It's so relaxing!" She called out stretching her arms in the air, giving Keitaro a generous view of her perky breast.

'She's definitely not sensei! Even she wouldn't go this far! And if she's not sensei, just what the hell is going on here?' Keitaro was about to finally address the nude woman but she had suddenly decided to wade towards him and put her arms under her cleavage, making her breast bulge upward a bit.

"Hey, what do you think? Don't you think my breast have gotten bigger recently? Take a look!"

Keitaro's male mind was telling him that this was too good to be true. Keitaro's rational mind was screaming 'HELL YEAH THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE! ABANDON THREAD! DISCONNECT IMMEDIATELY!'

Even though Keitaro knew something just wasn't right about this situation, he was once again over thinking the situation. Wherein he should have just got out of the hot springs and left as soon as he saw her, he was trying to put a rational, or at least, somewhat plausible, explanation for what was going on.

He hadn't even heard what she said afterward. All he knew was that she was suddenly pressing her breast to his arm while reaching down.

"HEY! CUT THAT OUT YOU PERVERTED FREAK!" Keitaro shouted and pushed the girl back, unintentionally pressing one of his guns to her breast. The girls face heated up red and he heard her moan slightly before the shock of hearing not a woman, but a man's voice registered in her mind.

Keitaro had half the mind to shoot the girl one good time to make sure she wasn't a succubus or something. He remained on guard, staring at the girl as she stared at him in shock as well. He rose an eyebrow as the girl suddenly had glasses on her face and her look was changing into one of horror. Keitaro's eyes widened again, this time having all the pieces of the puzzle falling into place.

'She...she couldn't see me...shit...'

"WAAAAH! SOMEONE HEEELP! PERVERT! A PERVERT! THERE'S A PERVERT!" The woman screamed.

Keitaro cursed yet again, finding it better to get the hell out of the room with the screaming banshee.

"You were about to grab my dick and I'm the pervert?" He shot back once he saw her getting out of the water and hastily wrapping a towel around herself. Her face heated up red and she paused as she heard what he said. Before he turned to face forward, he saw her hair bellowing with rage.

And just as he was turning forward, he found himself about to collide with another young woman. With a screech, he halted right in front of her, standing almost an entire head taller than her. She looked up at him with a bored expression and he could smell alcohol coming off of her.

"...Naru, is this hot guy I'm imagining in front of me the pervert?" She called with a slight slur, looking over Keitaro's shoulder. Keitaro sweatdropped and walked around the woman, out the door, and slid it shut slowly behind him. The door was closed at the same time he heard the first crazy girl.

"YES THAT WAS HIM! STOP HIM KITSUNE!"

And the chase was on again. Keitaro shook his head at the second girls antics and dashed down a hall towards a flight of stairs. This time, his senses did kick up. From the left side of the hall, a dark skinned girl with blonde hair was walking around a corner carrying a basket of clothes. Keitaro smiled at the younger girl, feeling her essence more and more the closer he got. The girl looked at Keitaro in confusion as everything seemed to slow down. With a quick spin, Keitaro dodged around the girl. However, their eyes were locked. He winked at her with a devious smirk before continuing his dash down the hall.

The caramel colored girl looked with her mouth slightly parted and the makings of a blush forming on her face.

'He...he saw me...the real me...?'

"What's with all the noise?" A sweet voice chimed in front of Keitaro and for the fourth time, a girl appeared in the young man's way.

'Oh for the love of-'

Keitaro did not sense this one either. Just like with the first two girls. Something weird was going on here. When the young girl, having dark blue hair and wearing an apron with a ladle in her hand, saw a strange, tall, and handsome young man in nothing but a towel dash right past her, she flushed as red as an apple.

"Stop right there you peeping pervert!" The first girl called while buttoning up her donned outfit. The tanned girl was following her too as they chased him.

'Damn these girls have got stamina!' Keitaro thought until he heard a fifth voice. 'That can't be good...'

"Where is the pervert?" A fifth girl with long black hair called out, wearing a white and red hakama outfit. She held a very sturdy looking bokken.

"There! There is the exhibitionist!" The dark skinned teen called with a very uncharacteristic cheerful look on her face. Keitaro frowned at that.

'What is she doing?' He wondered, but never the less, didn't stop running.

Finally reaching the stairs, Keitaro took two leaps and reached the top. Turning, he found that he was at a dead end...technically. He was on the roof of the inn. He could jump to the ground below, but that would require leaving his trench coat behind.

"Which I forgot in the hot springs, dammit!" He sighed in annoyance. "Well, it was fun while it lasted. I haven't had a good jog like that in a while."

As all the girls congregated around the young man on the roof, he sighed and held his hands up in surrender.

"Fine, you caught me. Now I have some questions before you start yelling." Keitaro tried but the angered looks on at least two of the girls let him know words were going to be no help at all. His eyes narrowed as he noticed both of the girls, being the long haired samurai and long haired pervert called Naru, molding ki. 'This just got interesting...'

"Eat my atomic punch!" Naru shouted, throwing a powerful hook towards Keitaro's face. At the same time, the samurai girl attempted a downward stroke towards his shoulder, opposite the side the pervert girl was attacking. Both attacks collided and caused a pulse of air to blow from the area, making the other girls present cover their eyes for a moment.

A few moments of silence followed as both long haired women looked on in utter shock. Their quarry was standing still, fist and sword still on contact, yet seeming to have no effect at all. In fact, Keitaro didn't even seem to be paying attention. He was looking beyond the group of girls to yet another female arriving on the scene.

"So noisy here...what's going on?" A mature voice called from the stairway.

"Oh! Dorm manager, we caught this pervert!" The woman known as Kitsune called happily, as if the whole thing were just a game.

"I thought I sensed you Haruka. What took you so long?" Keitaro asked walking forward. Naru and the samurai girl's attacks literally brushed off of him like nothing, and they were too stunned to attempt to attack again.

"Keitaro? Well how about that? Long time no see." She called just as naturally as Keitaro did. The two embraced each other in a loving hug, drawing confused expressions from all the present tenants.

"Um...what's going on here?" Kitsune asked the question on everyones minds.

 _ **Several minutes later...**_

Now seated in the 'living room' of the confirmed All Girls Dormitory, and after being introduced to the tenants (or at least learning their names) Keitaro was leveling a glare at Haruka that sent a chill down everyone's spines. The woman in question stood with her cigarette loosely between her lips, arms folded. She was sweating just a bit but one couldn't tell from her cool demeanor.

"Out of all the times we've talked on the phone...HOW COULD YOU FORGET TO TELL ME THIS PLACE WAS AN ALL GIRLS DORM?" Keitaro out right yelled for the first time since arriving. The tick mark on his forehead was indication of his very visible and audible frustration. Haruka took her cigarette from her lips and gave a nervous smile.

"I guess it sort of just slipped my mind." She offered, gaining a sweatdrop from the other present girls.

Keitaro sighed and flopped back on the couch, "Fan-fucking-tastic. Where's Granny Hina so we can sort this mess out and I can find out where I'm going to be staying."

"FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC!" Su suddenly started shouting as she jumped up and started running around the room, repeating the words in a sing song voice. Motoko's face flushed red and she stood to chase the young girl and put an end to such foul language, but not before giving Keitaro the darkest glare she could muster. Shinobu mouthed the words herself and then blushed a new shade of red. Only Kitsune would see the small smile on her face though.

Naru, being the only one not phased by the language stood up and slammed her hand on the coffee table. "What do you mean where you're going to be staying? Even if you are Haruka's nephew or Hina-baa-chans grandson, this is an all girls dorm! You shouldn't be here in the first place!" She declared with conviction. Keitaro just sighed and looked at Haruka for an answer, ignoring the screaming girl all together.

Haruka finally lit the cigarette and took a drag before answering. "Granny left a year ago to tour the world. She wanted to prove that she is still in her prime in all spectrum's of life and hasn't been back since. Senile old bag." Haruka whispered the last part, yet Keitaro heard and silently gave his agreement.

"Well this is just splendid," He sighed in annoyance. "This place is much closer to Tokyo U than the apartments I was looking into, but if it's an all girls dorm, I have no right to be here, especially if granny isn't here."

Suddenly, all of the girls surrounded the young man with shocked expressions. "What? You go to Tokyo U?"

"What's Tokyo You? Is it edible?" The dark skinned foreigner asked with a curious gaze. Keitaro's eyes widened as he realized she was serious.

The sudden change in attitudes amused Haruka and made Keitaro groan. 'All of a sudden I'm a celebrity? What type of fickle bastards are they?' Keitaro rose a hand just as the girls began to make up theories about him.

"Hold on, I never said I was in Tokyo U officially. I'm an intern for now. I'm taking the entrance exams for the first time this year to become a full time student."

The reactions made Keitaro groan again. The smallest girl, being Shinobu, seemed to have tears in her eyes. He had noticed she became really excited at the thought of him being a Tokyo U student, and unlike the others, she had hope in her eyes as well. The others, save the foreign girl Su, looked a bit miffed at the mix up, almost as if he had lied to them or something. The auburn haired girl spoke up with a shrug of her shoulders.

"We should've known. As if someone like this pervert could be a Tokyo U student." She sighed.

"Yes, I was almost fooled for a second by this treacherous male." The dark haired samurai girl shook her head. Keitaro narrowed his eye at the two of them but remained silent. Haruka noticed the glares being leveled at the two tenants and cleared her throat to change the subject.

"Anyway, Keitaro, you can stay here for the time being. I'm the acting manager until Granny sends someone else." Haruka covered her ears immediately, knowing what was going to happen next.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE CAN STAY HERE? HE'S A MAN!" Naru roared as Motoko, in an almost as loud voice, declared pretty much the same thing. Kitsune had her arms folded but was thinking along a very different line as the others.

 _'Hmm...he's not a Tokyo U student, but he did say he's interning there, which could mean he's already half way in the door. Plus he's Hina-baa-san's grandson meaning he must be filthy stinking rich.'_

"I don't see a problem with it! Besides, if he's interning at Tokyo U, he must have some smarts. Let's give him a chance. Maybe he can even tutor us!" Kitsune spoke seriously, while on the inside she was basking in how full proof her truth-inserted-into-lie plan was.

"What, Mitsune!? What are you saying!? This is an all girls dormitory, we can't just let him in like that!" Naru flailed her arms wildly, her face flushed red.

Motoko sighed. "As much as I agree with you Naru-san, Haruka-sama has already spoken. It would be unwise to go against her wishes."

"Damn straight." Haruka added with a smirk.

"That's nice Haruka, but that pervert is right. This is an all girl's dorm and I don't want to get taken advantage of by any of them. They all could be perverted for all I know." Keitaro responded offhandedly, though with no trace of humor in his voice. The building ki in the room wafting once again from Motoko and Naru drew the young man's attention. 'There it is again...these two have to be them...'

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A PERVERT YOU PERVERT!" Was all Naru could say in rage, her mind not comprehending the fact that Keitaro had been in the springs first.

"HOW DARE YOU INSINUATE THAT A WARRIOR OF THE SHINMEIRYU SCHOOL BE ANYTHING BUT A HONORABLE WARRIOR YOU FOUL DEMON!" Motoko had drawn a real sword this time, her hair bellowing behind her just as Naru's.

The words uttered by Motoko made Keitaro's visage darken however, and the ki he suddenly released made both Motoko and Naru stand down in shock. The pressure in the room became heavy and Haruka's cigarette fell from her mouth as she noticed the bending wood beneath Keitaro's feet.

"Keitaro, there was one more thing I wanted to ask you." She spoke in hopes of calming him down and once again shifting the conversation. She was starting to get annoyed herself that she was playing social worker to a bunch of half grown people. After a moment, the ki in the room began to fade and Keitaro took off his glasses with a sigh. He knew what Haruka was doing and knew it was best to calm down anyway.

"What is it?" He asked monotonously, obviously still annoyed by what the dark haired samurai had said.

"Where'd you park your motorcycle?" Haruka rose an eyebrow. Keitaro suddenly froze. The girls looked with bewildered expressions, seeing the newly arrived Urashima sweating.

"MY BABY!" Keitaro suddenly shouted and dashed from the dorm and down the stairs, leaving a dust cloud in his wake. The girls sweatdropped while Kitsune asked;

"What was that all about?"

Haruka took out another cigarette and shook her head in amusement. "He parked in a fire zone."

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 **So the truth behind Afterglow taking so long to continue is because of me being unable to write the final scene of the chapter, being Kaolla's scene. But I'm just going to bullshit my way through it and hope for the best soon.**

 **As for this story...it's a DMC crossover, what else can be said?**


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